Rare Mutation Ignites Race for Cholesterol Drug
Link to Quoted Source: http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/9152.php
First, I
would like to comment on the structure of the article. I believe that it was
well-written in the sense that it does a good job explaining the race for a new
drug that might lower cholesterol. However, I believe that it is lacking in
another sense. The title states that the race is initiated by the discovery of
a rare mutation. It would have been more informative if it included more
information on the mutation itself. For example, at the end of the article,
they mentioned a mutation that occurred within a family that encompasses an awfully
high cholesterol level and the gene in which the mutation occurred. Although
the topic was more focused on the actual race, more background information on
what really initiated the chase would have improved the article.
With that
said, I would like to state my opinion on the matter. It is great that we have
possibly found a way to lower cholesterol, a common cause for heart disease and
stroke, but I find it a bit saddening that this is what humanity has come to. I
know that in some cases, such as the one mentioned in the latter part of the
article, people are born with a genetically high cholesterol level; I also know
that there are cases where high cholesterol can be prevented. The lifestyle
amongst many people today is undeniably unhealthy. Popular interest has
promoted unhealthy food, and people continue to consume large amounts of foods
that are harmful in the long run. Perhaps if more people changed their
lifestyle, there would not be such a need for a drug to lower cholesterol. Even
though those are the ideals I hope the world would strive for, I know that I must
accept reality. “Cholesterol
levels among US adults today are generally higher than in all other industrial
nations” (Medical News Today, par. 3). Despite the fact that I believe that
people should strive for a healthier lifestyle themselves rather than obtain it
through medicine, I do wish that the project is successful. The modern world is
different; therefore, I hope that, if the drug happens to be effective, it will
change people’s lives for the better.
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ReplyDeleteFirst off, I commend you for reading through this long, scientific article. I admit, once scientific terms are thrown about in an article, I have a difficult time mustering the wherewithal to follow. That being said, I'm curious as to what else makes an article such as this one "well-written." You note that it does a "good job explaining," though I wonder if this is dependent on whom the author intends to address. That is to say, would this article be well-written if addressed to scientists? Would it remain well-written if addressed to minors? I invite you to consider whom the intended audience is and what features of writing affect said intended audience.
ReplyDeleteI actually really enjoyed this article :) I am a bit of a biology nerd and found interest immediately, and I wasn't hindered much by the scientific vocabulary.
DeleteAt first I thought that it was well-written for anyone who might not have had prior knowledge in biology; however, this may have been the case because I was perspicacious when I read the article. I previously took an AP Biology course, so I have a better understanding about what was occurring, which is why I might have felt that way. When I look back at the article from a different perspective, I do see that it can be quite complicated without prior knowledge in biology. Due to this, I find the article more well-written for those who are familiar with the subject, whether that be scientists or students well-versed in biology.
I am a little confused as to what you mean when you ask me to analyze what features of writing may affect the intended audience.
Last, but not least, thank you for commenting on my blog, Darryl!! :)
I think you did a great job analyzing this article. Instead of just summarizing, you give your thoughts on the rhetoric and also your opinion. That said, I think a tiny bit of summary - perhaps one or two sentences - would have been helpful to understanding your analysis.
ReplyDeleteOverall, the content is great. I agree with you on healthy eating, and I also like the way you handled this somewhat-sensitive topic.
This last note actually has nothing to do with your post, but I think the formatting of your blog is a little inconsistent, which detracts a bit from the content.
I appreciate the constructive criticism; it is very helpful information I will need to improve my blog. Thank you so much for commenting, Joanne! :)
DeleteAnd I will also try to format my blog a bit better